Last week I had one of those weeks that just felt really good. We (as in I and the children) were home every morning but one and that was just to get a few groceries. I had more patience for my children and they were pretty well behaved for the most part. I actually had a few moments where I felt like the mother I've always wanted to be. Oh so patient and kind.
So, yesterday Monday came again. I was ready to start my week because after all things were going well and I had figured out how to be the perfect mother. Then Monday came. Yes, dear Monday.
I don't know what changed. Well, I have some ideas. I am busy this week and have more on my mind, but really, I did spend time with them, sort of, they colored and I paid bills... and I did smile (ok, so my teeth my have been clenched, but they saw a smile!). I do know that when I allow myself to get busy with other stuff I have a hard time connecting with my kids. It's just a hard and not very fun lesson to learn. Maybe tomorrow I'll do better.
These are some of the responses I've been getting from Isaiah and Nathan when I scolded them: "You're doing bad!" (Isaiah) and "I still love you!" (Nathan). Like I didn't already feel guilty enough. :(
On a lighter note. I had coffee with two great friends last night. So good to connect and learn that I'm not alone in my struggles.
Best thing I've read this week: You can't tell me worrying doesn't help. I've worried about millions of things and not one of them has come true.
I took Nate to the bathroom the other day. He didn't "produce" much. He seemed quite upset about this. He then asked me "Will God fill up my butt again?" One of the moments that make the hard days easier.
OH MY WOOOOOORRRRDDD! I was all set to give you some sweet words of love and encouragement and then I read that last paragraph and howled my brains out. That is SOOOOO funny! Thank you for that lovely little ditty that will remain in my brain till the day I die. I'm glad you have a few things to fill your days with joy!
ReplyDeleteyep, had me laughin' too!! hang in there, you'll be a "good mom" again soon, i'm sure!
ReplyDeleteI know you will want to slap me, but Oh, for the good ole days" :)!!
ReplyDeleteBut yes, if I were to be honest, there are ALOT of those days that I felt like terrible Mom!!
There's a verse In Isaiah that I love to think of in relation to young Mothers; Isaiah 40:11b,..He gently leads those who have young"
I believe that HE understands, and HE is THERE to gently lead you through those tuff days !!
I wish I lived closer so they could drive "Grandma "crazy, a few days !! :) Love you, Mom
Yup, I laughed, too. =) What a kid. ALL good and perfect gifts come from the Lord. (even regular poops) =)
ReplyDeletethat reminded me of something i blogged about once:
ReplyDeleteL keeps talking about how that God puts the poop in her body, and no matter how pleasant or unpleasant the process of getting it out is, she gives Him the credit. For instance: “When I got this hard poop that God gave me out of my body, I praised the Lord!”
thank goodness for the funny things kids say...can you imagine how hard parenting would be without them?? :)
So rich, Sabrina! :) You gave me a really good laugh! You & your children are precious!! I am so glad to know that someone else feels like the "Bad Mom" on each and every Monday! (weekends are rough!!)
ReplyDeleteLove,
Angie